A fun new hack to survive the current covid-19 self-isolation with kids: Call your kids your coworkers. Everything is immediately more hilarious. My coworker asked to see my butthole today when she broke into my bathroom stall. I contemplated calling HR but I am HR and no one pays attention to the presentations on personal boundaries anyways. My coworker takes a dump with the door open. My coworkers are naked way more than I’d prefer. My coworker shit herself today. I had to give my coworker a bath when she barfed on herself at work.
My coworker woke me up this morning by sliding her hand under my nightshirt and putting her finger into my belly button. See? The world may be crumbling and we’re tuning in to watch President Snow address Panem and District 13 (eerily similar to Alberta) every morning for updates on TV, so might as well laugh while we can. For dinner tonight – Tricerataco Tuesday. Pro tip: wrap your hard taco shell in a soft taco shell and eliminate the crumbly mess. Get your tricerataco holder right here. Stay golden, Ponyboy. Until next time.
Muffin tin Monday! One of my biggest “food hang up” pet peeves is the notion that humans need 3 large plated meals a day. At the table. Breakfast foods, lunch foods, dinner foods. Do you want to know who decided pancakes were a breakfast food and pasta was a dinner food? MARKETING PROFESSIONALS. They told us what to do and we did it. We have subscribed to the notion of rigid food concepts for far too long. When we’re able to let go of our pre-concieved notions around food and eating, the world opens up a little bit. One of my favourite lunch at home hacks for kids? Muffin tin grazing platters. These can be used for any meal of the day, really. If your “picky” child struggles with a plated meal, refuses your offerings, and you just generally struggle with meal time – consider this option. Sometimes food is much less about what is being offered and moreso about how it’s offered. I like to include 6-8 healthy foods I know they love, and the remaining ones I hope they’ll try. Even if they don’t eat them, exposure is still important. I use muffin liners simply to control mess. Offering one large tin to both my kids encourages them to share and it’s 50% less cleaning (win/win). Try a 6-well muffin tin for solo kids (including complex carbs, fruits, veggies, proteins, etc – any meal can be deconstructed this way). Pictured here: pistachios, mini breton crackers, blueberries, dried yogurt melts, cucumbers, raspberries stuffed with chocolate chips, cashews, kiwi, strawberries, carrots, gummy bears, dried mango pieces.
It doesn’t even need to be snacks! Offer deconstructed tacos or chicken ceaser salad in muffin tins to make food a bit more fun and a bit less intimidating to children who don’t like to try new things. The possibilities are endless!
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